Let’s not be satisfied with mediocre, with normal, with just getting by. Let’s become the best version of ourselves that we’ve imagined. And maybe you’ve given up hope that it can happen. And that is actually the heart of this question: What do I do when I don’t feel like I’m enough? Let’s be honest, no one actually says that specific question but usually it is the root of other things going on in their business, relationships, etc.
Let me go ahead and recommend a book on this topic before I go any further… The Road Less Stupid by Keith Cunningham. I highly recommend it for every single business owner. Keith talks about the difference between things at a symptom level and dealing with things that are actually the real problem.
For example, issue: My Business Isn’t Growing and that is the symptom level. You can invest in your business, you can put more money into marketing, push yourself to do more sales… but you never really get to the bottom of it and continue to fall back into the symptom level: my business isn’t growing.
But that could just be a symptom of a deeper issue, a real issue might be that you don’t feel like you’re enough of a leader to lead your team. You don’t feel like you deserve success. Or you might not feel qualified.
Can you see the difference?
I can have a client come in and say, I want to make more money. And we can do that, but it comes with doing the deep work. I had this one client I had been working with for about four years, when he finally did some of the deep work and took himself to the next level… that year he made over eight hundred thousand dollars more in revenue. It took addressing more than just the “business stuff” in his life. We had to do the deep work!
Maybe you’re struggling right now and maybe you’re already aware that you don’t feel like you are enough. Or maybe the feeling is something like this:
I don’t feel qualified.
I feel inadequate.
don’t feel smart enough.
I don’t feel like I have enough experience.
I know this feeling and feel this pain: from being a chubby kid in middle school, literally that was the weight I carried and it told me I’m not enough. And I have a twin brother who was skinnier than me, smarter than me, seemed more likable than more, more athletic than me… and my brother never said anything to make me feel that way, but that was the story I was telling myself on the inside.
You’re Not Enough
You’ll Never Be Enough
I’m not talking about something I don’t know about or I haven’t lived. And I just want you to know, if you’ve been in that place where you feel like you take two steps forward and three steps back… I know what you are experiencing. You tell yourself you want to be successful and the next thing you are telling yourself, no… I don’t because then people will know me and I might be exposed. They will know that I am not qualified… WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES? Well, there are a lot of reasons and I am going to give you three points to help you if you are dealing with this feeling of not enough, unqualified, inferior, inadequate…
This one is very important! Let me tell you again, YOU ARE NOT BROKEN! Majority of the people on this planet have felt the same way you have at some point in their lives. The bulk of society! And I want you to know that you are not broken, you are not this inferior inadequate person because of something you did or something you don’t know.
I also know that if you are reading this, you don’t want to be normal, either. Normal is like mediocrity. You might not want to be normal, but I am going to tell you this feeling of not being enough is very normal.
You know what’s broken? Your Patterns of Thinking and Believing are BROKEN. The Rules That YOU Have For Your Life Are BROKEN.
And so I just want you to hear it: Listen, you are beautiful. You are loved. God put purpose and destiny on the inside of you. He doesn’t create junk. You’re not broken. You’re great. There is greatness on the inside of you, why do you think that I write that at the end of every blog? Because it is true!
If you feel like I’m not enough, it’s a lie. And you’ve got to reject that. Now, I spend weeks and I take people through this to the other side where the lies fall away. I coach them on this. And literally weeks and weeks, sometimes months to breakdown some of these ideas, the lies… and we expose them.
Here is a simple process you can do today:
You’re never going to be successful. Your business isn’t going to grow. You’re going to go break through that wall. You are not enough. You’re not smart. You’re not qualified.
These are just some examples, you know yourself… be honest about the lies you have been telling yourself because the quickest way to change is to face reality! As long as something is denied, it cannot be healed! As long as something is in the dark, it will stay in the dark until it is brought into the light! So HOLD THEM UP TO THE LIGHT AND STRIP THEM OF THEIR POWER!
I am going to be successful. My business will grow. I am going to break through that wall. I am enough. I am a Child of God. I am smart. I am qualified. I was created with a purpose! I am loved.
Find truths that empower you! Above is just a starter list for you!
You know, some of you you’re hung up on the mistakes of your past or the lack of education. Well, if you’ve got mistakes in your past, you can literally find the truth that says my mistakes of my past, equipped me to serve others at a higher level. Somebody taught me this: The people you are best equipped to serve are the, is the person you once were. And so take that outdated story that my mistakes disqualify me, FLIP IT & SAY, my mistakes have qualified me to make a greater impact in the world. So find a more empowering truth and begin to speak that over your life.
The Framework I work through with clients and in my masterminds, it is called the Five Framework. Or you might refer to it as the Five Decisions of Freedom… And I’m not going to go into all of them… but the fifth one is to choose to do the deep work. If you want to have the freedom you desire in your life, it is not going to just happen… not going to fall from the sky. If you’re only dealing with surface level symptom level issues, you’ve got to go deeper. You’ve got to have the courage to say, I’m not going to hide from my past. I’m not going to hide from those shadows and the darkness.
Listen, as long as something is in the shadows and the darkness, it can have power over you that it should not have. So that’s why we have to bring it into light. We have got to expose it so we can strip it of its power. So don’t let stuff hang out in the shadows and the darkness and dominate you, because you have greatness inside of you.
Let me tell you four ways, four steps that you can do to get some deep work done.
Deep work is something you cannot do in isolation, that’s why the first one I started with was community! You just need to reach out, for some of you it is going to be your community, others it might be a coach, for some it might be a counselor/therapist… BUT DON’T DO ISOLATION, nobody thrives in isolation.
When we do the work, we can serve and give to others freely! Don’t hide out from the deep work because there is greatness on the inside of you! And you need to be able to give it away! I love you guys, have a great day!