One of the biggest things I do as a coach and as a facilitator of Masterminds is helping people to create habits by making the decisions, locking in the routines, mindsets that make them successful. A pretty consistent conversation I have with people is how to make the habits stick?
How do I make a habit stick so that it becomes a part of my life?
Most people will say, “I’ve tried it all”… “I’ve done this, I did that, it just didn’t work.”
And I am going to tell you, YOU HAVEN’T TRIED IT ALL. And I am telling you this in love, I’m getting up in your grill because I love you. But before we even get to the good stuff, you all need to stop making excuses that keep you from having the life that you desire, the impact you were created to make. I am borrowing some language from a mentor, Tony Robbins, “You need to Decide, Commit, and Resolve.”
And it is all one thing; decide, commit, and resolve. A lot of people, they make a decision but it’s not a real decision until you take action. Another quote from Tony I love, “Never leave the site of a decision without first taking action.” Some of you decided to start a habit and you haven’t done any of it.
COME ON ALREADY!
It is time to decide, commit to do whatever it takes and resolve. I don’t know if you got any fans of the series National Treasure giving this a read today. It is a good flick, people. They talk about resolve and how they held resolute. That’s lost in our culture to a large degree.
If you’ve been having a hard time starting a new habit or making a habit stick, it’s because you haven’t truly committed and resolved to say failure is not okay. Not an option. YOU have got to get to that level of commitment. I could give you all the tricks, tactics, and tools in the world but if you don’t make it resolute, it’s not going to happen in your life. It takes like 66 days to develop a new habit. It is going to happen overnight. I suggest reading The One Thing; in there they talk about the new research because back in the day they used to say it took only 21 days to develop a new habit, but now the research says about 66 days is a sweet spot to make a habit stick.
When you commit, you have to commit to the work over time. It takes about 2 months to create a habit. You cannot just wish yourself into doing something or hope to do it. You have got to have resolution… YOU NEED TO KNOW YOUR “WHY.” You need to really know why this is an important habit to establish in your life.
Just had a coaching call with a client and he started to kind of beat himself up a little bit. And I said, “No bro, no. Don’t beat yourself up. Just commit and resolve to get back on the path.” So you have fot to do the work to get the why.
3 How-Tos With Establishing New Habits
These are just a couple tricks tactics that you can use to establish a new habit after you decide, commit, and resolve. And committing to say, “hey, I’m going to do the work over time.”
I can’t remember who taught this to me or where I read it; might have been Atomic Habits which is another great book. While I am on the topic of books, I suggest Willpower Doesn’t Work.
What is Habit Stacking? First, you have to ask yourself, what do I already do? For example, you brush your teeth every morning. So adding in a new habit of daily affirmations after brushing your teeth, “I’m trust, I’m alignment. I’m rhythm and rest and energy…” I say them every day and habit stacking is a great asset.
You might disregard this, already know this, or think I am being very simple here but it works! Jerry Seinfield talked about having a visual tracker when he was coming up with a joke a day. After he would do the first day, then the second and so on the goal became to have a chain of unbroken days. The chain of a visual tracker, calendar or checklist, can give you a practical way to track your progress and to continue to make a habit.
I know it is not rocket science, but get someone to hold you accountable to establishing that new habit. You need to keep promises to yourself, but it is always good to get somebody that’s going to ask you the hard questions, “did you do it? did you do the work?”
And by the way, if you want to amplify this one, make consequences. If you don’t do what you said, you’re going to put money on the line. When I was making workouts a habit, I had an accountability partner and we were both trying to lock it in. And we said, “Hey, if you don’t do the workout, you have got to send me 50 bucks via Venmo.” I’ll be transparent and say, I sent her $50, but only once people only once, because I knew she was going to ask me and so get some accountability, put some cost on the line so that you lock it in.
You want to establish a new habit? Decide, Commit, Resolve and then get practical in doing the work because you can create the life that you desire and create the impact that you desire… but you’re not going to get there without the right habits to support that. So do what you need to do to lock in that new habit in 66 days!
I hope this served you! Love you all! Drop in the comments below and tell me how you might start making those new habits a reality, cause you should never leave the site of a decision without taking action. This is where you should go out there and give your greatness to the world because somebody needs what’s on the inside of you! Go out there and give it away! Have a great day!